AND TO THINK THAT I SAW IT ON HULU STREET: ED MCBAIN’S 87th PRECINCT: LIGHTNING
I’m clicking the weird, the wonderful and the what the hell were they thinking when they coughed up a budget for this piece of raw moose dung.
Articles
THE MIDDLE SEAT: “CINEMATIC LITMUS TEST”
My initial thought is, we come up with a basic questionnaire, designed by people who enjoy and understand the art of cinema, and anyone who fails it gets put on the list.
YOU MISSED IT!: A PERFECT GETAWAY
I suspect it ranked well below what it should have because people knew too much about it before they saw it
THE MIDDLE SEAT: “SCHWARZENEGGER OR SONY CLASSICS”
In my humble opinion, there are certain people who don’t “get” movies, and thus should not be allowed to view movies at all.
OSCAR RANT 2011
Paul Preston’s annual once-over of the nominees. Who will win, who should win, and the Top 10 Films of 2010.
THE MIDDLE SEAT: “LET’S NOT GO TO THE LOBBY”
It is time. In a column about the “movie-going experience” we have to address food.
RANTING ON A CLASSIC: NETWORK
I’ve seen this film and, while it’s certainly not bad (it makes a decent enough rental), it’s also not the monumental satire everyone claims it to be.
THE MOVIE THAT PISSED ME OFF: THE ECLIPSE
I wish the actors would either stop mumbling, speak up, or the sound mixer would equalize the volume.
THE MIDDLE SEAT: “WHAT DO YOU HAVE A TASTE FOR?”
From the dawn of silent films, humans have had to navigate the treacherous social waters of yet another group entertainment decision
FROM THE DARK SIDE: JACK KETCHUM’S “THE GIRL NEXT DOOR”
I watch many, many dark, disturbing films, but most don’t even come close to this masterpiece of fear.
THE MIDDLE SEAT: “PLEASE TURN OFF ALL DISTRACTIONS”
To everyone everywhere who ever goes to a movie theatre I politely remind you to SHUT UP!
THE MIDDLE SEAT: “WHERE YOU WANNA SIT?”
I need to see the movie straight on. And that’s not just at the theatre. I will go for any seat in any living room that gives me the most centered view of a movie.
FROM THE DARK SIDE: LET ME DIE QUIETLY
A noir-type thriller that may require a certain mind-set from it’s audience for true appreciation.
WELCOME TO THE MIDDLE SEAT
This column is dedicated to movies. And while there are many aspects to cinema, I want to talk about us – the moviegoers.
GHOSTBUSTERS – WHY WE GONNA CALL?
“Ghostbusters” deserved (and deserves) either an incredible sequel – or a non-existent one.
FROM THE DARK SIDE: THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE (FIRST SEQUENCE)
Tom Six’s film is about a trio of people who are sewn together mouth to ass to create a “centipede” type creature. And then when one defecates, well…..you know.
INDIE REPORT – NO FOOTING
We all have dreams, but if we don’t achieve them, does that mean we can’t still be happy?
FROM THE DARK SIDE: OTIS
Maybe it will help convince young girls not to talk to big, creepy strangers in their front yards.
RANTING ON A CLASSIC: THE BEST YEARS OF OUR LIVES
The themes of post-war recovery and renewal, coupled with the hidden grief and sacrifice faced by returning veterans made for a story that still speaks to us.
DE-AGING HARRISON FORD
Can we please freeze him circa 1982 during his “The Empire Strikes Back” and/or “Raiders of the Lost Ark” days?
THE MOVIE GUYS REWRITE: RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK
This “re-write” is not mine at all – it actually sprang from the minds of the men who created “Raiders” in the first place.
RANTING ON A CLASSIC: CADDYSHACK
“Caddyshack”‘s stature has grown to the point where it now stands alone as the undisputed master of the raunch-comedy – the standard bearer by which all others are judged.
INDIE REPORT – THE VIDEO GUYS
An indie that reminds us of why we love indies
REPORTING FROM THE FLOOR OF COMIC-CON 2010
Both nerd central and ground zero for the coolest stuff pop culture churns out every year.
THE MOVIE GUYS REWRITE: VERTIGO
There is such a thing as going too far afield in your plot construction.
RANTING ON A CLASSIC: ONE FROM THE HEART
Or, “Ranting On A (Not Quite) Classic” or “Re-examining a Failure”. You choose.
OVERLOOKED GEMS, PART 3: BAD MOVIE NIGHT
Classics? Perhaps not. But considerably better than their rep, and worth at least a look-see by the discriminating cinephile.